Well its been a very long 10 day challenge for me. Meaning I haven’t kept my end of the bargain. You see, it’s because my mind has been at conference for the past month. Things are changing up there, a lot. I am not even sure what will come of all the noise, but I know that there is great movement there. So that can’t be too bad, right?
It’s a good thing really, but it makes my sentences a bit confusing. And most of the time tangents within my strings of words, create such space between complete thought patterns, that most of what I have to say is lost in translation.
Either way here it goes.
One of my close friends went “Home” for a week, so he left me his moped. I’ve explored most of the world by moped so it only felt natural to explore my own hometown on two wheels as well.
There is something tangible, and raw about navigating a city on two wheels. I have witnessed it all over the world, but there is something unique about experiencing your own home city as an outsider looking back in. I have been here for a week now, and for the nights that I have driven the moped home, I have felt such a sensation for it. Some nights the feeling pulses through me so wildly that I tear up as I look out at familiar places. Nostalgia rushing over me in waves. Feelings about people, places, and situations surface as the wind runs through my hair. All of the feelings whether good or bad, send such strong electric waves through my mind, that I can feel them throughout my body.
There really is no place like home. It’s like a love affair that takes pause, but never ceases. That kind of love for someone that never truly dissipates. Even after years of not seeing one another, at first sight after a long absense ….you can still vividly remember the feeling of their lips on yours.
Austin is that place for me. It’s got that first kiss kind of nostalgia for me. No matter how long I leave it for, or how far I wander away from it….it never holds a grudge against me. Every time that I return to it, I am always welcomed with that loving and longing embrace that I so desperately seek and desire.
And even in the city, the stars still shine. I forget that sometimes. The lights of the city are very stimulating to the human eye, but the stars reach for the soul. For the dreamers still dream, even if they are surrounded by man made walls and concrete paths.
And to dream, we need that starry night sky to peer into. And it’s always there. No matter what.
That’s what I see when I drive through this city at night. I see the stars, I hear the music in my head, and I feel the warmth of the possibility shining down on me. Possibility, from all the wishes thrown up above that have been gifted by dreamers that live under this section of the starry sky.
I remember how beautiful it is to be part of such a large community. A community of lovers, dreamers, and creators. And for a moment as I sit at the red light, with both feet touching the concrete below me, I feel so grounded, and so alive, and so in love with every particle of my existence. Because I know that although I may leave these streets behind in time, and although I leave them quite often.
There will always be a piece of me here.
And when I return, I will once again feel that old familiar embrace. And it will feel just as desirable as it did on first touch.